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Trying to follow God and draw closer to him each day. Some days I slip, some days I fall, I'm so glad He never does.

Friday, October 30, 2009

I Didn't Panic

A time to reflect…..

This morning a young girl came into the office, looking slightly scared, and whispered to me that she thought her water broke.
What are the odds that in an office of four I am the only one here at this time.
I gave myself five seconds to panic, and then noticed there was not a puddle in front of my desk and her pants were dry. I was very thankful and realized I can do this.  I got some information from her, called security for an ambulance and sat down with her to calm her down.  She had no one else for me to call. No one. She is 8.5 mths along, she thinks, and is all alone. She is scared. I so wanted to pray with her. I was praying but not with her.

She asked me if I had any children, and I laughed and said yes, four. She looked at me, lol, shaking her head, ‘Four, I can’t do this one.’ I re-assured her that she could and she would be fine. 

But, do I know that? No, I don’t, I don’t know her situation, I don’t know if she knows the Lord, I don’t know anything about her. But I do know that God loves her, I do know that somehow God can do for her what he has done for me and many others who give their lives to Him completely.

The birth of all of my children, no matter what my situation at the time was, is one of the happiest times of my life. That moment when you actually hold the baby you have prayed for, felt move, and loved, is pure joy. Seeing that little face look up at you and your eyes connect, I can close my eyes right now and still see each of my children’s small tiny faces looking straight through me. Even though they say they can’t really focus and see you, there is a connection and a mother’s love that flows straight through. Love that came first from the Father.

In God’s Love, sheila

update:  I've mentioned before that sometimes it takes me awhile to get things, I've been thinking of the girl all morning and her situation and it dawned on me that perhaps she wasn't keeping the baby.  I spoke with my supervisor and she confirmed it.  I am so thankful that in this day in age, she choose adoption rather than abortion.  I hope I get the chance to encourage her and let her know what a wise decision she made.  I pray there is a family waiting to share Jesus with this small miracle.

Thursday, October 22, 2009


A few weeks ago we got the chance to go to Akron Falls, what a beautiful place.  We ended up running late on time and batteries for my camera so I can't show you the water falls, but it is beautiful.  Great place to go hiking, to take children, they must have at least 10 different playgrounds.

Here are a few pictures:

See what we have been up to:

Seriously, is anyone else grossed out by this, in my picture you can actually see the slime on his hand, ugh...
Sondra asked to take Tommy on his field trip to Atwater Farms.  She said it was hard, but so glad she did. 

God is good all the time.
In God's love, sheila

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Addition, +, edition (which do you prefer)

If I can't do one-type of addition; I'll do another.

We were sitting at the table on Friday night eating dinner and continued to hear this 'MEOW' loudly and insistent.  There we found a little kitty stuck in our tree in the front yard.  Oh, the kids were just tickled.  Owen is loving his new kitty.  He even blamed the cat for a two-week old scratch on his leg.  I guess that means he is staying.  It's not the cutest, honestly, but the kids are enjoying him/her and we have named it Patches.
Every once in a while I can see how much Serena is like me (sometimes it makes me cringe and other times it makes me giggle).  She called me into her room twice last night (2:30 AM and 5:00 AM) to get this adorable kitty because she was trying to sleep and he was bothering her.  Should I show her the irony of the cat waking her up and her waking me up?  I have a feeling it will be lost on her or she'll just look at me and grin.
It's been quite a while since I've updated. And for good reasons: I'm busy. I mean really busy. I didn't really realize how busy I have been until a friend called and asked if the kids would like to go to a church function with her kids. She was willing to pick them up and drop them off, almost 2.5 hrs. I said YES so fast that I surprised myself. lol. That's tonight and I'm sure they will have a great time as I know I will.
In God's Love, sheila

ps: it's been two years today that my brother-in-law Darren went home to be with the Lord, I look at my children and my heart hurts for his.  Please say a prayer for them. We so much miss his sense of humor and cockiness, neither can be replaced.  See you in Glory, Darren.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Quilt of Holes

DISCLAIMER:  I don't know who wrote this, it was not me that I know, but it is good, so I thought I would share.

Quilt of Holes

As I faced my Maker at the last judgment, I knelt before the Lord along with all the other souls.

Before each of us laid our lives like the squares of a quilt in many piles; an angel sat before each of us sewing our quilt squares together into a tapestry that is our life.

But as my angel took each piece of cloth off the pile, I noticed how ragged and empty each of my squares was. They were filled with giant holes. Each square was labeled with a part of my life that had been difficult, the challenges and temptations I was faced with in every day life.  I saw hardships that I endured, which were the largest holes of all.

I glanced around me. Nobody else had such squares. Other than a tiny hole here and there, the other tapestries were filled with rich color and the bright hues of worldly fortune. I gazed upon my own life and was disheartened.

My angel was sewing the ragged pieces of cloth together, threadbare and empty, like binding air.

Finally the time came when each life was to be displayed, held up to the light, the scrutiny of truth. The others rose; each in turn, holding up their tapestries. So filled their lives had been. My angel looked upon me, and nodded for me to rise.

My gaze dropped to the ground in shame. I hadn't had all the earthly fortunes. I had love in my life, and laughter. But there had also been trials of illness, and wealth, and false accusations that took from me my world, as I knew it. I had to start over many times. I often struggled with the temptation to quit, only to somehow mustered the strength to pick up and begin again.

I spent many nights on my knees in prayer, asking for help and guidance in my life. I had often been held up to ridicule, which I endured painfully, each time offering it up to the Father in hopes that I would not melt within my skin beneath the judgmental gaze of those who unfairly judged me.

And now, I had to face the truth. My life was what it was, and I had to accept it for what it was.

I rose and slowly lifted the combined squares of my life to the light.

An awe-filled gasp filled the air. I gazed around at the others who stared at me with wide eyes.

Then, I looked upon the tapestry before me. Light flooded the many holes, creating an image, the face of Christ. Then our Lord stood before me, with warmth and love in His eyes. He said, 'Every time you gave over your life to Me, it became My life, My hardships, and My struggles.

Each point of light in your life is when you stepped aside and let Me shine through, until there was more of Me than there was of you.'

May all our quilts be threadbare and worn, allowing Christ to shine through!

God determines who walks into your life ....it's up to you to decide who you let walk away, who you let stay, and who you refuse to let go.  When there is nothing left but God that is when you find out that God is all you need.

My supervisor sent me this today. She has no idea what is going on in my personal life, but as I mentioned earlier, there is no such thing as 'coincidence', not when God is involved.

But as I think about this, I do want more of Christ in my life, I need more of Christ in my life.  Sometimes it's hard to give things completely over to God and trust him for the outcome, even if it is not the way you planned.  But know that somehow, some way, He will redeem it and use it for his glory. 

In God's Love, sheila

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

How's Your Prayer Life?

I’ve never been known to be the most observant person. In fact my mom likes to remind me how she could almost hide something right under my nose and I would still be looking high and low for it.

I would like to think that I have become a little more aware and observant as I have aged. Then I’ll have someone say ‘I was driving right behind you, didn’t you see me?’. Ummm no, sorry, try beeping and waving your arms out the window, I’m sure to see you then.

So when I read the message on prayer here, The Ugly Truth About My Prayer Life, I thought, well at least he is honest and that’s really what it is about if you want to change something. I’ll say a prayer for him.

Then, my husband found some old papers in our barn with the Lord’s Prayer written out. We bought our house from a dear lady who has taught Sunday School forever, or so it would seem. As I began to look through the papers, my mouth fell open as I recognized the names, they were kids I knew, way back when we were about 10 maybe, wish there was a date on them.

Look what was on the bottom on the pile:

Can you barely believe it? What are the odds? Well, they are about 100% if God is trying to get your attention.  But, like I said, I'm not the quickest when things are not spelled out. 

There was also one written by my best friend Tammy. She died when she was only 19. Just holding her paper gave me a smile. I think I would like to frame it for her mother. What a nice trip down memory lane. How nice to have these to look at.

So I put them on the shelf and went about my day. I still couldn’t connect the dots.

Well my Pastor sure knows how to hit someone over the head with a message : )

Can you guess what his message was on? Yes, the message was on prayer.

And as I sat there thinking about my own prayer life, I was left was some shame and guilt. To be completely honest.

There’s one particular area in my life that I have stopped praying for and about. Why, when that is the area that needs the most prayer? To be honest, again, I’m ashamed to admit I don’t think it will help and I feel guilty praying when I’m not even sure I really want to pray about this situation anymore.

Yes, I really believe that God can do the impossible, that he can move the mountain. But why doesn’t he? Again, just being honest.

I know logically what the reasons are or could be, and then again He is God and He could have his own reasons in which I know nothing about. I mean really He doesn’t have to have his reasons fit into my logic. Which stinks!!!

I can see through certain things that have happened in my life that I am now in a place closer to God than I have ever been before and I also recognize how much further I have to go.

So for now, I will continue to pray and be honest with God, even when it’s not pretty, even when I would rather say ‘I’m doing ok’.

In God’s Love, sheila